No Words Unspoken

"The purpose of a fish trap is to catch fish, and when the fish are caught, the trap is forgotten.
The purpose of a rabbit snare is to catch rabbits. When the rabbits are caught, the snare is forgotten.
The purpose of words is to convey ideas. When the ideas are grasped, the words are forgotten.
When can I find a man who has forgotten words? He is the one I would like to talk to."


I struggle on a regular basis with memorization.  I struggled with learning music, because I couldn't remember words to a song.  I struggled learning history,  because I couldn't remember the dates of events.  I struggled with my work, because I couldn't remember everything I did during the day.  These were constant burdens upon me, failings I could not overcome.

Yet as I meditate upon wisdom and knowledge, I realize something.  I may not memorize all the details, I may not know the exact words, but I do understand the subject.  I came to the understanding that as I wander along my path with Tao, all beings should be judged upon their own merit, not in comparison with others.  I may not know the words spoken by my ancestors, but I understand their lessons.

Knowing a thousand things is trivial, understanding a thousand things is walking the path to divinity.  Knowledge is gained through simple tasks, oft lauded as the most important thing, yet only by those that have knowledge.  This is a flawed path, as those with knowledge want others around themselves to judge, just so they can be better than another. 

Eliminate competition, eliminate envy, eliminate the drive for knowing everything, strive to understand, strive to find worth in everything, strive to find peace in the universe, how you weigh yourself in this world is the thing that will bring you joy or sadness. 

Forget the words of the worlds and understand the music of the soul.



For most of this year, I have been sparse and distant to this spot of meditation in my life. I sought out success, gained it, and suffered for it.

Now, as I return from success back to focus on the self, I find that people have been coming to this quiet place and reading my simple words. To say I was astounded, would be an understatement. I did not follow the path of Tao and so it left me, I have been a man lost and without peace for many months.

Yet, I remember something so important;
To understand strength, you must first know weakness.
To know joy, you must feel sorrow.
To value life, you must face death.
To find yourself, you must first become lost.

I'm balancing my life and returning to peace, as I begin to work meditation, yoga, and exercise back into my routine, so shall I begin to blend my meditations and my writings once more. Never have I found the peace as when I closed my mind and let my words flow forth.

You are no so far away from the flow of Tao that you it will never return, you just have to stop seeking it and it will fill you.


A Quote on Returning and Forgetting

Our original mind includes everything within itself. It is always rich and sufficient within itself. You should not lose your self-sufficient state of mind. This does not mean a closed mind, but actually an empty mind and a ready mind. If your mind is empty, it is always ready for anything; it is open to everything. In the beginner's mind there are many possibilities; in the expert's mind there are few.

- Shunryu Suzuki (1905-1971)
Courtesy of Daily Zen

First I'd like to comment about Daily Zen. This is a wonderful site that always helps set me in the right direction. A nice zen quote and then over to their meditation center; Zendo. Zendo lets you set a silent timer for your meditations that will gong when the time is up. It is the easiest way to make that 15 minute daily meditation a part of your routine.

This quote covers so much on my beliefs that I felt I must share it. I would also like to extrapolate on it more. Many people I meet are beginners with a mind closed. They feel they are trying to be experts in fields they aren't aware of. A closed mind surrounded by illusions is easily comparable to being locked in a cage surrounded by fog. You see nothing, react to nothing, and the world slowly disappears to only include that tiny box.

A child's mind, the sage's mind, is like standing atop the mountain. You gaze across the infinite with only the horizon as your limits. You are free to travel to those horizons and the heavens beyond.

Even if our creativity leads to failure, hurt pride will not kill you. Even if our curiosity frustrates, showing ignorance will not harm you. Even if our wisdom is not heard, having it will not weaken you.

Do not be afraid of being thought foolish;
Do not be afraid of being thought rebellious;
Do not be afraid of being you.

Ask every question, consider every choice, experience the world without fear. Remember that Nothing is perfect, so fill your mind with nothing.


The Death of Self

It was time to let myself die. After weeks and weeks of working myself to near death, a break came and I let it happen.

As I rose again at dawn, I felt one cycle end and a new one begin.

As I struggle to continue a life of peace and mindfulness, I learn more the depth of these teachings. We spend our youth trying to act like adults, faking behaviors we don't fully understand. We spend our adult years still trying to do the same thing, but no longer looking up to our elders, we look to our peers.

The path of Tao has taught me to stop looking outward for definition. To stop looking for definition, period. I am a person, traits may be used to define me, but I am not the sum of another man's words. My clothing, my appearance, my possessions do not define who I am, only how others see me. My words and my actions are taken only to complete my responsibilities in a way in which I can respect myself. As I respect myself, the world around me continues to do what it should... Ignores me.

I am not on this world to flaunt myself before people for their affections. That is a waste of energy and time. I stand strong and work hard to wake each day with a conviction of self. I am proud of who I am and the life I live. All that I have become can be used to help change the world around me. Every strife I have survived, is a new story I can share to ease the suffering of a weary soul.

I choose one word to define who I wish to be, Sage. I wish to be a man that others may respect my wisdom and to be the one to guide the lost back to a path of their own choosing. In my life, if I do nothing else, let me be a force of change, a force to guide others from fear and ignorance and towards a path of self enlightenment, self respect, and peace.

You are the change that is needed in this world, stand tall, take responsibility for you state of being, and be the change that will heal your suffering.


Rage for Tomorrow

As I fight each day to take one more step,
As I find each day a struggle to feel the peace of Tao,
As I forgo each day for the sake of the next,
As I forget each day the pleasures of the past,

I rage against the world for pushing me,
I rage against the society that fails me,
I rage against the people that disappoint me,
I rage against the person I am becoming,

With each line I type,
With each line I fell,
With each line I remember,
With each line I return,

I am me at this moment as much as in the last, and more so in the next breath. Accept the cycle and become one with divinity. Forget and Return to innocence.


Climbing the Mountain

Mountains are often connected with great sages. The place that one must ascend to ask their wisdom. I first came to the understanding that the mountain was the challenge that one must overcome to seek wisdom. Then, I came to realize that the sage was the first to struggle to reach the top of that mountain.

Recently I began to question this connection deeper. As you move closer to Tao, you begin seeing the deeper connections of the world and become part of the greater whole. I assumed this meant that ascending the mountain was to become more in touch with nature, away from the distractions of society. Therefore, the one to climb the mountain for wisdom will see that all their struggles amongst people are for naught as all that is perfect is provided by nature.

I came to a new possibility as well. Maybe... just maybe. The sage was tired of how blind the people were to their actions, how deaf they were to wisdom, and how vocal they were about their so called entitlement; so he left to somewhere peaceful. And the one that climbed that mountain... proves that not the entire world is worth turning away from.


Managing Inaction

As my life has moved me forward, my path has felt divergent from the path of Tao. Success, money, stress, and frustration. Trying to move closer to Tao, I would waver from my success and not know what to prioritize.

For the sake of my family and my future, I chose work. I worked myself to stress and frustration, then I realized... I climbed the mountain. This was not divergent from the path of Tao, but a challenge along my path. Walking the path of Taoism is never an easy one, it just makes life feel easier.

I thought that my path and beliefs had made life easy and never understood the Taoist saying that living Tao is hard. Now I know deeply what that means. All things flow in cycles and I have given in to this cycle of pain. The cycle comes to an end as I have learned all the basics well enough to have forgotten them.

This new cycle begins as I flow forth in a new direction.

As I leave off for a while on a new project, mayhap I will post new meditations here. I will leave you off with something important that made my struggles with the writings here make sense.

"You don't write because you want to say something, you write because you have something to say." ~ F. Scott Fitzgerald


Old Type of New

We move ceaselessly forward into a new decade. As I stumble forward into opportunity and responsibility, I find myself finding peace in simpler things.

I am an avid supporter of progressive technology, computers, and video games. Yet, I find myself becoming more and more intrigued by the simple things. Handicrafts, housework, puzzle boxes, and taking up every chance to say yes to something new.

It was an amazing year of awakening. It was my first year to know myself. Now I can face this year as the man I have become and continue to change the world around me.

The greatest change I plan for this year is to try and break down the barriers I have set up between myself and the rest of the world. I have nothing to fear from the world any longer. I was forced to face the emotions and situations that tore me apart years ago, and I realized in that moment, I am not the boy I once was. I have nothing to fear from my feelings any longer.

I feel the pain, but it does not control me. I let the emotions run their course, but they do not dictate my words.

A thousand paths, a thousand destinations, the horizon is infinite, and I will walk the simple path with those that wish to learn with me.